Thursday, March 31, 2016

Baby Fever!

With my Facebook news feed filling up with pictures of brand new little ones and baby announcements, it is hard to not get baby fever! Whether it is first time moms or my friends who are adding an additional child 2, 3, 4... they are adorable and get me thinking that it may be time to add another one. I knew that these feelings would hit at some point. Sure, having a child can be overwhelming. I mean, your life is changed in so many ways. What I did not expect was how bad Mike has baby fever!



So excited! :)

No, this is not a pregnancy announcement. Now that Olivia is at an age where she is getting better at communicating, she and Mike have a great time together. It was difficult for Mike to connect with her at first, but he now understands that babies do grow up :)

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What would it mean to have another child??

1. Having another precious child to fill our hearts with even more love.
2. Divided attention.
3. $$$$$ - another crib, car seat, stroller, high chair, more diapers .... the list goes on and on.
4. Someone for Olivia to entertain.
5. More sleepless nights.


There are so many more things to add to that list. I believe I can handle most of it. It has to be the money part (and space for all the material things) that has me slightly concerned. We need to have our own place before we can think of actually adding to our family. Bigger car? 2 bedrooms or 3? And do not forget the hospital bills! Now that I have gone through it once, I think that I would like to have a midwife the next time around. My doctor was very kind in Spokane, however she is not the one who delivered Olivia and we found that very frustrating.

In case you were wondering, here are some of the differences between a doctor and a midwife:
What’s the Difference Between a Midwife and a Doctor? http://www.yourchildbirthguide.com/midwife-or-doctor.html 
One of the main differences between a midwife and a doctor is the type of education they receive. An obstetrician is a doctor that specializes in pregnancy and birth. He or she has gone to medical school and is trained to do surgery. Obstetricians don’t attend home births. A small few attend births at birth centers.
A midwife is trained in all things related to pregnancy and birth, but does not go to medical school. Although midwives don’t carry the title of doctor, they are no less competent to provide care for pregnancy and birth. In fact, countries where midwifery care is the norm have the best outcomes for both moms and babies.
Midwives specialize in low and moderate risk pregnancies in healthy women. Midwives only refer women to physicians when there is a problem, and they do not perform C-Sections. Some midwives attend homebirths, and some only work in hospitals.
Did you know you could choose a Family Practitioner? Many family doctors are also qualified to do prenatal care and delivery. They are not surgeons, like obstetricians, so they don’t do C-Sections. If you have a family doctor you already love, this might be a good option!
Different Models of Care
There are two general models of care for pregnancy and birth. One is the midwifery model of care and the other is obstetrical management.
Under the midwifery model of care, pregnancy and childbirth are considered normal events, not medical ones. The focus is on preventative care during pregnancy.
Prenatal appointments with midwives are generally longer. Midwives take a lot of time to answer questions and talk about nutrition.
The use of the midwifery model of care has been proven to reduce the likelihood of C-Section and other intervention, including the use or forceps and vacuum. The midwifery model follows a “wait and see” approach during labor and birth. This means that medical interventions are not used unless there is a medical necessity for them.
Obstetrical, or medical management, tends toward more intervention in order to have more “control” over labor and delivery. A care provider who operates mainly under this model is likely to use many interventions during labor, such as pitocin to speed up labor. Using many interventions during labor when they aren’t needed leads to more Cesarean births.
Generally, midwives practice the midwifery model of care and obstetricians tend to take more of a management approach. However, there are exceptions. It’s important to note when you’re choosing a midwife or doctor that not all midwives practice the midwifery model of care, and not all doctors use a lot of intervention. It’s important to ask questions when you’re looking for a care provider. That way you can choose a midwife or doctor that suits your preferences.

I have often heard of having a Doula. I have had it explained to me a few times from different people and do not know if that is the way to go for me...
Doula: A doula is a professional trained in childbirth who provides emotional, physical, and educational support to a mother who is expecting, is experiencing labor, or has recently given birth. The doula’s purpose is to help women have a safe, memorable, and empowering birthing experience. http://americanpregnancy.org/labor-and-birth/having-a-doula/ 

Random thoughts and dreaming of another baby :)





Wednesday, March 9, 2016

Part Time Working Mom


Even before I went on maternity leave, people were asking me if I was planning on returning to work. It wasn't even just the question, but the fact that people would whisper when they asked. I'm not going to lie... the thought of not returning crossed my mind often. For as long as I can remember, my dream has been to be a stay at home mom. How amazing it would be to spend my days taking care of my home and educating my children using things I had learned while earning my degree. Then I feel the tugging on my heart. I know that there is something else that I need to be doing. Something more.

I returned to work after my maternity leave but it was definitely not the same. It was difficult to leave my baby each and every day. My mind stayed at home and I found that my heart was not in my work anymore. I loved my job and the work that I did. My love for that beautiful girl at home was greater. Over time I lost my professional self. I started to hate work and became very bitter. A large part of the problem was that er could not afford the kind of childcare that we wanted and therefore were always in a panic when it came to making sure Olivia was going to be watched.

Advice to expecting parents: Have a serious, in depth conversation about what you can afford and what you are going to do for childcare well before the baby gets here.

When Mike brought up moving back to the west side, I was hesitant. If you know me you know how much I love Spokane. That is my hometown! However, it became apparent to me that I needed a change of scenery and the help of family would be nice. I took almost five months off (Sep - Jan). Going into it I was thinking, 'This is going to be great! I want to do this, this, and this with Olivia. We are going to get out and see everyone and make new friends!" Well, most of that did not happen. I found myself in a funk. But I can say without a doubt that I needed that time off to recoup and figure out what I wanted to do.

There were several days that I wanted to hang up my parenting responsibilities and walk away. A lot of the stress was not necessarily coming from Olivia. Mike and I were living apart for awhile and are still living in someone else's house... which means that most of our belongings are still in storage. We are figuring out how to make things work until we can afford to get our own place again. There are still days that I know I need a break. That is actually a big part of why I decided to go back to work part time. I do not want to spend most of my time away from Olivia (and Mike because we have very different schedules) but I knew that some work would be healthy for all of our relationships.

Back in December Olivia and I had a play date with my friend and her daughter. She mentioned that her responsibilities at home are growing and that she was looking to step down from her position. We had a few conversations and I was blessed to take over for her. I am an Administrator for a former employer and I am enjoying learning some new skills! What is the best part of my day(when I have to go into the office)?

Coming home to this beautiful face and having her run to me to give me hugs and kisses! XOXO








 I am learning how to balance. Currently I am still juggling, but balance is in the works. Becoming a mother is the biggest blessing in my life so far. I have learned a great deal about life and myself. I understand things about my parents that my siblings will not understand until they become parents. I enjoy working. I get this fulfillment knowing that I am contributing to society and helping to make a difference in students lives.

Some women are called to be stay at home moms, some feel a longing to be back in the work force 100%, and then there are those who want to do a little of both. For a long time I did not understand why any woman would want to go back to work full time. Now that I have experienced a little of all three, I understand how it works differently for everyone. To each their own. I am thankful for my part time work and that I can even do some of it from the comfort of home while spending time with my family. 

Wednesday, March 2, 2016

Back At It!

I went back and forth on whether I wanted to return to blogging or not. Then it hit me the other day that my memory is not that great (I could try to blame it on mommy brain, but it really just is not that great) and I want to make sure that I remember these things.

Today, March 2, 2016, this is how I describe my (almost) 18 month old:

Spunky. Attitude. Loud. Adorable. Kissable. Terror. Wild. 
Smiles. Sleeping Beauty. 

Up and down. Up and down. I am actually having more difficult time connecting with Olivia these days. I am frustrated when I am with her and miss her when we are apart. I am so thankful that Mike is connecting with her more and knows when to step in because I am frustrated beyond belief and need to leave the room. Let me correct myself... it is not just Mike who will do that but my mom and my sisters. They are quick to snatch Olivia up. When we get a place of our own, I will have to put on my big girl pants and learn how to work with my daughter through frustrations. On the flip side, parenting will be different without an audience. 


Such a big girl!

Olivia has her 18 month check up next Monday so we will see how she is growing physically.

Mentally.... she is amazing. No, she is not talking in full sentences yet. She is very good at communicating with sign language and here is a list of the words currently in her vocabulary:

DaaaaaaDDDDDDYYYYYY
Aaapo = Apple
Dogee = Doggy
Kitty
Gee = Binky
Po po po (for Papa (grandpa Cole))
Mom
Book
Eeeee *touching face* = Eat
Mo *pokes mom's boob* = More = Mommy's milk
Eeeeee *rubbing chest* = Please

It may not look like a ton but we are so proud of her! Some of these are very new and it is exciting to watch her practice saying them over and over.










These are the most recent pictures and videos of Olivia. She is wearing 2T pants and has some of the best facial expressions. It is crazy to see each day how much more like your dad she is looking and acting :-)